So having explained each element of flourishing over the last five days I shall be going back to a more usual blog post today, though I am going to try to demonstrate how it links to flourishing. My day has been more normal too. In the last couple of weeks Sur La Route book and coffee shop had been closed and so knit and natter had visited another venue. Today we were back to normal.
I find that on the one hand I don’t like it if I feel as though my time is allocated. However, at the same time having a level of routine and predictability in life adds a certain level of security. In order to flourish we need to be able to have a sense of control in our lives, we need Positive emotions. I felt really happy to return to our routine.
As it happens two people came today who have not been regularly in the past. One came by accident once and stayed. Hopefully she will be back again next week. Another woman, who is French came too. I was delighted to see someone French. I am really hopeful that we can become a naturally bilingual group, which was always part of the purpose of the group.
Last week I decided to try some hexagonal crochet. I have never done it before and wanted a new challenge. I was thrilled when my hexagons turned out well. Before I went to knit and natter I blocked them, so that I could start putting them together. I took my crochet hooks but forgot to take my yarn with me! So, as you can imagine, no progress was made. Thankfully I had taken some knitting with me that I was able to get on with. However, I seem to have misplaced the pattern for the jumper that I’m knitting. I hope that I might find it later.
Over the last couple of days we have been helping a couple who bought a house nearby. They signed for it last autumn. This is their first visit and of course there are a number of things for them to organise. I think that they are a little, rabbits in the headlights at the moment. We remember what that feels like. So we are glad to be able to help them on their way. When you choose to make your life in a different country there are many challenges that you face and have to overcome. It is part of the rich tapestry of life experiences.
I think that I have another person coming to the crochet weekend. So slowly I am filling the places. Please do share this with anyone that you think might be interested.
Until tomorrow…
Tales from the Sheshed France 
Lovely crochet Zenna! Sounds like the group is going well too!
Following up on flourishing: I understand why ‘getting back to normal’ gives a feeling of being in ‘control’
One of the key ideas in Buddhism is that letting go is important ‘
‘ You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.’
‘Control is an illusion’ type ideas.
As you know, John (my childrens dad) had a massive stroke in his 40s and after two years in a coma he sadly died. During this time I had a lot of time to think about impermanence and how medical science would not let go of the idea that they could control what was happening! They couldn’t – they just delayed the inevitable. This whole period taught me that control is an illusion and impermanence is a constant in daily life.
Ironically this understanding helped me to learn the value of living in the moment (helped by meditation to try to discipline my thought – even if it jumped around like a box of frogs)!
I suppose my point is that our regular patterns of behaviour help us to feel like we are in control but it might be helpful to think of these patterns as a comfort rather than control. As I age and become increasingly disabled I often find myself comforted by established patterns. They structure my life and are important (and feel like my very large, favourite cardigan). Things pop up unexpectedly however, and as I respond I often find joy in those unexpected changes over which I have no control – the ability to ‘flex’ often moves me into spaces where I flourish.
Just a personal reflection (intended to be food for thought not a claim to know better)! 🤗🤗🤗
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Thank you this is a really useful reflection. The idea of control is undoubtedly an illusion. As with all things it is necessary for us to find ways in which we can attempt to flourish, to find ways in which we can take responsibility for our lives and our well being.
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